Marriages are made in Heaven

 One would like to believe that the institution of marriage and the context of living as married has received lots of approval and affirmation.

Most people feel that marriage provides companionship, confirmation and a structure to live in.

There are defined boundaries, roles, and responsibilities that the partners or the family adhere to.

The literal meaning of marriage is “the legally or formally recognized union of two people as partners in a personal relationship”

It has been approved by generations together. There are a lot of celebrations events and fun fairs around the event of a marriage. In most cultures, it is the men and the women who get married and most of the time the woman goes to her husband’s home. Both of them have to live up to the cultural coding and the norms that have been defined by that particular society cast or creed. 

The modern generation and society approve and legalize the marriage of homosexuals too.

If I would reflect on the generational mindset of youngsters today there are many who believe that one does not need a rubber stamp to be in a relationship.

They are as committed as loyal as beautiful as a married couple would be but do not believe in the institution of marriage.

They wish to justify the relationship as a sacred one by not getting into the institution of marriage.

If I were to reflect on my life journey I have been married 40 years from now and have found a safe and comfortable den in the institution of marriage and family.

The younger generation believes that they can relate to family and others as intensely as they would to married partners.

Some may not have the biological or sexual need to get into the men-women relationship.

There are people who pass judgments on live-in relationships or people who stay together just to discover their compatibility. There is a generation that has a taboo on such people and would not justify it as adults, parents, or people in authority.

I strongly believe that even if the two people are going to get married a live-in relationship would ensure physical and emotional compatibility. 

There is a lot of literature on for or against the institution of marriage which can be examined understood and made through personal choices.

Right now it is only the right age that people consider the time to be married, personal readiness, willingness, and compatibility are secondary factors.

Reasons some people don’t want to get married

·        You are focused on your career.

·        Bad experience with marriage in the past

·        A preference for non-monogamy

·        You  view marriage as a patriarchal institution

·        Marrying your partner is not legal where you live

·        Financial reasons

·        Divorce rates

·        You don’t need marriage to legitimize your relationship

·        You feel marriage comes with too many rules and expectations

·        You’re just not that interested in the relationship

·        You are willing to get married to the right person, but otherwise, it’s not a priority

Where are you in all of this?

Author:-Dr. Nayana Shah (Ph.D.)

           Director, Manthan

             Ahmedabad 

Comments

  1. Sudeshna bhojiaMarch 16, 2022 at 1:33 AM

    A wonderful topic under the scanner.
    Me and my daughter- are two opposites.
    I believe in adjustments to be made to make a relationship work. I also believe that in marriage, it is not just the man and the woman, but also the extended family members and children who give a lot of direction to the institution, or otherwise.
    My daughter- believes in 'no-strings-attached' relationship. No hang ups. No expectations. No scope of heart breaks.
    I respect her decision and try to understand her point of view as this generation is different from ours.
    There is change everywhere.
    And the way she has grown up seeing us in a 'marriage' might have also led to the 'change' in her outlook.

    ReplyDelete

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