Why do we Produce children? When sometimes they are assets and sometimes are liabilities.

 Whenever you get married the first thought that comes to your mind is when you will have children. Having children becomes such an important dream for the parents, the in-laws, and friends around you.

People become very curious, noisy, and intruding in this very important phase of one’s life.

So having children becomes almost a compulsion at each stage in life. Even if one is not prepared one gets into the rat race of having children.

There are very few couples or individuals who make a conscious decision to not having children because they are not prepared for it.

Once you have children they become an immense source of joy, fulfillment, and nurturing for the parents.

If I were to take my example I had two children in a row and they were the most burdensome and I rarely enjoyed my motherhood until they were five.

They were symbols to show off and gratitude towards in-laws. Only once they grew up to be adults could I engage with them on a one-to-one basis.

My Husband being busy with his career contributed little to their upbringing over the growing up years.

However, now they have adults who want to contribute and make every decision in their lives.

Once children grow up you relate to them on one basis because there is a relationship where they understand you are you understand them.

They also become a source of dependence and responsibility. So even in later years of life, one can depend on them for illness, old age traumas, and fights between the partners.

So it’s a very thin line as to whether it's worth having children or not having them but it is important to make a conscious choice instead of getting away by social norms coding and compulsions that push you into producing children without a conscious thought.

The only mistake you can make is to remain indecisive. It’s important to make the decision and pay the price for whatever conscious you may encounter.

The more mistake you make there are more learnings on the path. So be prepared to make this mistake and keep learning on the path of parenthood.

The possibility of taking the risk is worth trying all the difficulties and dilemmas one goes through.

When they are born some are ugly and some are beautiful. How you handle the sibling’s rivalry between these siblings, is also a concern for most parents. 

Author:-Dr. Nayana Shah (Ph.D.)

           Director, Manthan

             Ahmedabad